can a person with a clean record go to jail for his...

can a person with a clean record go to jail for his first offense?

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I live in the state of north carolina, my boyfriend and i had a spat, i pushed him he back handed me back. Cops were called in by my mom (over protected mother) He was arrested, and out on 1000.00 bail. Will he go to jail, even if i dont press charges????????


  1. maybe but learn this lesson fast….dont fight…always better to bite your toungue and leave…

  2. In most states these days it doesn’t matter if you press charges because the state will press charges. He might get out this time if he agrees to anger management or domestic violence classes, but I can’t promise that. I know in Tennessee he’d probably spend at least a little while in jail.

  3. No he will not you need to press charges so that he will… ALso leave him and do not take him back again if he abuses you!

  4. The DA would have to decide to pursue the case. If it is not that "crucial" and you do not file, the matter will be dropped.

  5. if you don’t press charges then no . . .but if you are a minor, your mom can press charges.

  6. why are you saying your mother is over protective, he had no right to slap you regardless if you pushed him, he probably won’t go to jail, but know this (and I know from experience) if they hit you once they will do it again, and it gets worse everytime until you leave in order to stop it

  7. Yes he will. Domestic violence is really a serious offence and is a guaranteed way to go to jail. If hes lucky he will only get 30 to 60 days and probation for a year. I suggest you get him legal help.

  8. Yes, it is possible. Much depends on the arresting officers, the district attorney, and the judge.

  9. I think he should go to jail even if it is his first offense.

    Maybe not!

    But, who’s going to pay all that money for bail? Are you goiing to do that? Are his parents wealthy enough?

  10. if you don’t press charges he still could get some time, and probably asked to complete an anger management course.

    Either way he shouldn’t have hit you, and you should consider anger management classes yourself.

  11. He’ll probably get a fine and community service,as well as probation.(If he has a clean record–no offenses.)

  12. If he hit you he will do it again. You should press charges. Hitting and pushing are 2 differant things. He will probably beat you in the future.

  13. This is considered domestic violence, and it is taken seriously in all states. If there is a witness to the incident, or if the police officer sees evidence that such an attack occurred, an arrest of the suspect is mandatory. Whether the person assaulted files a complaint, or not is irrelevant.

  14. If you don’t press charge, he might not go to jail. Your case is minor domestic issue.

  15. A person can go to jail even on their first offence. Since it is the first time they may get off a little lighter, but not necessarily. Even if you don’t press charges the city/district attorneys can choose to since he broke a law.

  16. Yes, he can. It is up to the judge. I have worked in the courts for years. I saw a man come in for a FIRST OFFENSE dressed like a bum with a smart-a** attitude and the judge put him in jail for 10 days.

    Now most judges, especially in larger towns with crowded jails, will not do this…but it is up to the judge. Also, some offenses never make it to a judge in crowded areas. They are worked out before hand with the courts.

    If he has to go to court, best answer is for him to dress like he was going to church or at least in clean clothes, nice shirt. Be respectful of the judge and the court. Say "Yes, Sir or Ma’am", look directly at the judge, don’t ramble, and answer the questions clearly.

    You don’t say your ages, but if he is an adult and you are a teenager the judge might look at this poorly. If you are both adults, ages should not matter.

    You can also probably go to court as a witness and explain that the situation was not serious and no one was hurt. Do NOT ramble or say too much. Short and to the point.

    ALSO: People on this list should NOT be just telling you "No, he won’t" when they do not know the complete facts in the case, the judge, the laws in your state, etc.

    A sidebar: You both need to learn to keep your hands off each other in anger.

  17. Assault is a crime so he could go to jail even if you don’t press charges. It really depends on the judge.

    Many women don’t press charges even in a very abusive relationship and the court may feel it needs to intervene for the welfare of the abused person.

    In your case, it’s not likely that your b.f. would spend any time in jail.

    However, you really should reassess your relationship with him. Violence is not an acceptable way to deal with conflict. I have been married for many years and I can’t imagine ever pushing or striking my wife under any circumstance! She is too precious to me. Find someone who feels that way about you. This is more serious than you may think. You got a wake-up call. Don’t live in denial. He will hurt you again.

  18. Domestic Violence Laws any more are dictated by the state. Nobody has to press charges because the state automatically will. You’re lucky both of you didn’t get arrested. First time he may get some kind of diversion and anger management with probation. Sounds like you live in a volatile situation where you both could use some anger counseling. Or better yet, rethink the relationship all together, because any kind of violence is not a good sign for a happy tomorrow.

  19. the state can press charges and i’d have called to thats abuse once he hits you and you let him off the hook he’ll do it again and again

  20. That depends. Any crime that is punishable by prison can end you up in prison, even for your first offense. If you don’t press charges, the prosecutor may or may not do it on his own.

    The real question is why you can tolerate a situation where you get hit? I was taught to never ever hit a woman. Never! It astounds me that a guy will hit his lover. That isn’t love, it is something else, like a twisted thing. If you don’t press charges, charges may be dropped. If that is your decision, fine but you need to stop the relationship where a man will hit you. There are zillions of us out here who would never ever do such a thing.

  21. I’m not sure how the laws are in NC but in kansas he could do some time, even if you do not want him to. Once he’s booked the DA takes over the case and if they find merit to prosicute then he very well may. However, you should be able to make a statement at his hearing and that will have weight with the judge to where he may only give probation. From the sound of things, as long as the laws are similar then this is just a misdermener offence. The fact that he has no record will help but if I had to make a guess I would probibly say he will get one year reporting or non reporting probation and be ordered to attend and compleat an anger managment course (standard procedure for DV). As I said your statement will hold weight and if you want you can talk to the DA prior to the court date, you can try to see if you can get them to drop the charges.

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